This article appears in the Art of Manliness website.
Think back to your last haircut. How’d you feel about it when you walked out of the shop? Disappointed? While your disappointing haircut might have been due to poor barbering, it’s often the case that your poor communication with the barber was at least partly to blame. Barbers can’t read minds. If you don’t tell them exactly what you want, you’re going to get whatever haircut the barber feels comfortable giving. For example, I knew an old barber (and I’m talking old) who’d give every customer a crew cut if the customer didn’t explicitly say exactly how he wanted his hair cut.
If you want to avoid this fate, you have to learn how to talk to your barber. But telling a barber what you want can be intimidating for a man, especially with all the special lingo they throw around. Well, never fear. I called up registered master barber Steve Hankins from Red’s Classic Barbershop in Indianapolis, IN to get the scoop on how to confidently communicate with your barber. With his tips, we’ve created a comprehensive guide on what to say to your barber so you get exactly the haircut you want next time you plop down in that chair. Let’s get to it.
The spaces between your hairline and your ears are called arches. Here’s how you can trim them.
High arch. You can ask your barber to cut the arch around your ear higher into your hairline. That will leave more space between where your hairline ends and your ears begin. Men with smaller ears might consider a higher arch as it can make the ears appear larger. The disadvantage with having a higher arch is that it can look messy and awkward as your hair grows out. And if they’re too high, they make you look pretty dorky.
Natural arch. For most men, keeping their natural arch is the way to go. That’s what Steve the Barber recommends; “It just looks better,” he says. Tell the barber to keep your natural arch and he’ll just clean it up with some short trimming.
Tell him how you like your sideburns
Finally, tell him how you like your sideburns. Basic details you should give him include how long and how thinned out you want them. Possible sideburn lengths include:
- Top of the ear
- Mid-ear
- Bottom of the ear
If you’re not going for the Ambrose Burnside look, ask your barber to trim and thin out your sideburns a bit.
Now quit yapping and listen to your barber for a minute…
After you’ve told the barber what you want, Steve suggests shutting your yap and listening to your barber’s suggestions. “A lot of guys come in with an idea of how they want their hair, but it’s just not possible with their hair type. Or what they’re asking for won’t look good with their face. Customers need to come in with an open mind and they have to be flexible,” says Steve. Listen to what your barber has to say and trust his expertise.
Your relationship with your barber is like any good relationship-communication should be a two-way street. He should listen to what you’re looking for and give you feedback and advice. A good barber will ask you if you’re happy with how your hair looks as he goes along. If your barber doesn’t communicate at all and doesn’t listen to your preferences, it’s probably time to pick a new barber.
One of the best parts of the barbershop tradition is that as you partake of this manly ritual, the barber can become your buddy, someone you’re not only comfortable with, but look forward to seeing. After awhile, all you’ll have to say when you plop down in his chair is, “Give me the usual!”